Protecting Children and Youth From Sexual Violence
A Guide for Parents and Caregivers
May is Sexual Assault Prevention Month—a time to raise awareness, challenge harmful attitudes, and commit to building a world where every child and youth can grow up safe.
Sexual violence against children and youth is a devastating reality in Canada. It is also preventable. This post draws on Canadian research and resources to help parents, caregivers, and communities understand the scope of the issue, recognize the signs, and take action to protect young people.
The Scope of Child Sexual Abuse in Canada
Child sexual abuse is the most hidden form of child maltreatment. In fact is, 1 in 10 Canadians report being sexually victimized before the age of 16.
CANADIAN CENTRE FOR CHILD PROTECTION.
Key statistics include:
Child sexual abuse is the least likely to be disclosed by victims, and most cases never come to the attention of professionals such as doctors, social workers, or police.
49% of all victims of sexual assault reported to police between 2009 and 2014 were children under the age of 17. Of those, 26% were under the age of 13.
93% of child maltreatment cases are never brought forward to police or child welfare.
The majority of adult survivors of child sexual abuse report that they did not disclose the abuse to anyone when they were children.
Perhaps most concerning for parents: in the majority of child sexual abuse cases, the offender is known to the child.
Parents, including biological, adoptive, step, and foster parents, were responsible for more than half (59%) of all family-related sexual offences against children and youth (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
Sexual assault is also the only violent crime in Canada that is not on a decline (Canadian Women's Foundation). Young women aged 15 to 24 are at particular risk: 47% of all sexual assaults are committed against young women in this age group (Canadian Women's Foundation). Among postsecondary students, one in seven women experiences sexual assault during their studies (CIHR).
What is Child Sexual Abuse?
Child sexual abuse includes a wide range of behaviours and situations. It can be contact abuse (touching, fondling, oral sex, penetration) or non-contact abuse (exposure to sexual acts, voyeurism, online luring, showing a child sexually explicit material) (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
Importantly, child sexual abuse does not have to be violent or happen repeatedly for a child to be deeply impacted.
A single incident can cause significant trauma. And children cannot legally consent to sexual activity with an adult—consent and choice only apply between peers who have the legal capacity to consent, not between an adult and a child (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
Technology has also changed the landscape of child sexual abuse. Offenders may use the internet to groom children, to create and share child sexual abuse material, and to extort young people. The Canadian Centre for Child Protection reports that 78% of child sexual abuse images assessed by Cybertip.ca depicted prepubescent children under 12, and 63% of those were under 8 years old. Fifty percent of the images depicted explicit or extreme sexual assaults (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
The Grooming Process: How Offenders Gain Access
Children and families often struggle to understand how abuse could have occurred without them knowing. The answer often lies in a process called grooming.
Grooming is a slow, gradual, escalating process through which an offender builds trust and comfort with a child and the adults around the child, in order to eventually sexually abuse the child (Canadian Centre for Child Protection). It is a deliberate manipulation that can take weeks, months, or even years.
The grooming process typically involves:
Establishing trust with the adults around the child, appearing kind, helpful, and good with children
Building an emotional connection with the child, often through extra attention, gifts, money, or special privileges
Creating emotional dependency on the offender
Confusing the child into feeling equally responsible for the sexual contact
Discouraging and preventing the child from telling anyone
Making the child feel obligated to, and protective of, the offender (Canadian Centre for Child Protection)
The betrayal of trust that occurs during grooming is often one of the most devastating components of the abuse. Children are dependent on adults for their basic needs, and they will typically do whatever they perceive as necessary to preserve that relationship—including complying with sexual abuse (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
The Impact of Child Sexual Abuse
The effects of child sexual abuse can be profound and long-lasting.
Each child's experience is unique, and impacts vary depending on factors such as the nature of the abuse, the relationship with the offender, the child's age and developmental stage, and the degree of support received after disclosure (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
Potential impacts include:
Learning difficulties due to changes in concentration, attention, memory, impulse control, and organization
Emotional dysregulation, including extreme moods, anxiety, depression, numbness, or dissociation
Difficulty forming relationships and trusting others
Physical complaints such as headaches, stomach aches, and chronic pain
Changes in appetite and sleep patterns
Self-harming behaviours, including cutting, substance use, and risky sexual behaviour
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) (Canadian Centre for Child Protection)
There are strong connections between child sexual abuse and mental health conditions, including depression, anxiety, panic disorder, and suicidal behaviour (Canadian Centre for Child Protection; Canadian Women's Foundation). However, early detection and appropriate support can help reduce these long-term effects.
Why Disclosure Is So Difficult
Many people wonder why children do not immediately tell someone about sexual abuse. The reasons are complex and deeply tied to the nature of the abuse and the grooming process.
Children often:
Feel responsible for the abuse, believing they did something wrong
Experience shame and guilt, particularly about any physical response or attention they may have enjoyed during the grooming phase
Fear they will not be believed
Worry about what will happen to their family or to the offender
Have been threatened or manipulated into silence
Do not fully understand that what happened was abuse, especially if the offender is someone they trust or love (Canadian Centre for Child Protection)
Research indicates that less than 25% of children immediately disclose sexual assault.
Many survivors never disclose during childhood at all. Disclosure is often delayed, partial, or disclosed only after direct questioning.(Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
When a child does disclose, the reaction of the adult is critical. Children who feel believed, supported, nurtured, and safe when disclosing have the most success in recovery (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
Prevention Programs That Work
The good news is that sexual violence is preventable. Research has identified effective prevention strategies that empower young people with knowledge and skills.
One of the most rigorously tested programs is Flip the script with EAAA® (Enhanced Assess, Acknowledge, Act), developed by Dr. Charlene Senn at the University of Windsor. This program is grounded in research showing that women are most at risk of sexual assault from men they know—acquaintances, friends, or family members—not strangers (CIHR).
The program shifts focus from teaching women to fear strangers to empowering them to:
Assess the risk of sexual violence in situations with known men
Acknowledge that risk quickly
Act to defend themselves if necessary
Crucially, the program also focuses on women's own sexual desires and agency, not just on risk avoidance. A randomized controlled trial with nearly 900 university students found that the program decreased sexual assaults by 50% and had other positive effects, including better risk perception and increased confidence in self-defence (CIHR). Even among participants who later experienced sexual violence, the program reduced self-blame.
An implementation study involving over 500 students from five Canadian universities confirmed its effectiveness in real-world conditions, reducing sexual assault by 42% (CIHR). The program has now been adapted for teenage girls, Francophone university students, and trans students, and has been implemented in more than 30 colleges and universities in Canada and six other countries.
How Parents and Caregivers Can Protect Children
Prevention is not just about teaching children to be safe. It is about creating environments where abuse is less likely to happen, where children feel safe to speak up, and where adults are informed and vigilant.
1. Talk Openly About Bodies, Boundaries, and Consent
Use proper names for body parts. Teach children that their bodies belong to them. Give them permission to say "no" to touch—even from relatives or trusted adults—and to tell you if anyone ever makes them feel uncomfortable.
For older children and teens, talk about consent explicitly. A 2015 study by the Canadian Women's Foundation found that while 96% of people in Canada believe all sexual activities should be consensual, only one in three understands what consent actually means. Consent is enthusiastic, ongoing, and can be withdrawn at any time. It cannot be given by someone who is unconscious, underage, or in a relationship of trust or authority (Canadian Women's Foundation).
2. Understand the Grooming Process
Be aware that offenders often appear to be good with children. They may offer to babysit, coach, tutor, or mentor. They may give gifts, special attention, or privileges. Grooming can also happen online. Do not assume that someone is safe simply because they seem nice or because they are a family member.
3. Monitor Technology Use
Offenders use technology to gain access to children, to groom them, to create and share abusive images, and to extort young people. Talk to your children about online safety. Keep devices in common areas. Know what apps and platforms your child is using. Remind them that anyone can pretend to be anyone online, and that they should never share personal information or images with someone they have not met in person.
4. Believe Children When They Speak
If a child tells you about abuse, or if you suspect abuse, believe them. Children rarely lie about sexual abuse. Your response matters more than almost anything else. The Canadian Centre for Child Protection advises:
Stay calm. Do not show shock or anger that might frighten the child.
Tell the child you believe them. Say, "I believe you. Thank you for telling me. This is not your fault."
Reassure them that they are safe and that you will help them.
Report the abuse to child welfare or police. In most Canadian provinces, adults have a legal duty to report suspected child abuse.
Seek professional support for your child and for yourself (Canadian Centre for Child Protection).
5. Challenge Victim-Blaming and Support Survivors
Victim-blaming is unfair and dangerous. It can make survivors feel that abuse is their fault and make them less likely to seek help or report what happened. One in five women report being made to feel responsible for their own sexual victimization (Canadian Women's Foundation).
Sexual assault is never the survivor's fault. It does not matter what they were wearing, what they were doing, who they were with, or where they were. The only person responsible is the perpetrator (Canadian Women's Foundation).
6. Address Systemic Barriers
Recognize that some children and youth are at higher risk due to additional discrimination and barriers they face. Indigenous women and girls, women with disabilities, homeless and underhoused women, and 2SLGBTQ+ youth face disproportionately high rates of sexual violence (Canadian Women's Foundation). Prevention efforts must address these intersecting forms of discrimination and ensure that services are accessible and culturally safe for all young people.
What to Do If You Suspect a Child Is Being Abused
If you suspect a child is being abused, it is your responsibility to act.
Report to child welfare or police. In Canada, the duty to report suspected child abuse overrides any considerations of privacy or confidentiality. You do not need proof—only reasonable grounds to suspect.
Do not confront the alleged offender yourself. This can compromise the investigation and potentially put the child at greater risk.
Do not interview the child or ask leading questions. Leave the forensic interviewing to trained professionals.
Document what you have observed (what the child said, what you saw, dates, times) and provide that information to authorities.
Seek support for yourself. Learning that a child you care about has been abused is deeply distressing. You deserve support too.
A Final Thought
Sexual violence against children and youth is a preventable public health issue. It requires all of us—parents, caregivers, educators, coaches, neighbours, and community members—to be informed, vigilant, and willing to act.
We must talk openly with children about bodies, boundaries, and consent. We must understand the grooming process and recognize that offenders are often people we know and trust. We must believe children when they speak. We must challenge victim-blaming and support survivors. And we must advocate for systemic changes that address the root causes of sexual violence: gender inequality, discrimination, and unequal power relationships.
Every child deserves to grow up safe, supported, and free from violence. Prevention starts with us.
If you or someone you know is seeking support for sexual violence, help is available.
Canadian Centre for Child Protection: protectchildren.ca
Hope for Wellness Helpline (Indigenous support): 1-855-242-3310
Assaulted Women's Helpline: 1-866-863-0511
If you are in immediate danger, call 911.
At Lynwood Charlton Centre, we provide trauma-informed counselling and support for children, youth, and families who have experienced sexual violence. You are not alone. Reach out to us to learn more.
REFERENCES / SOURCES:
Canadian Women’s Foundation The Facts About Sexual Assault and Harassment
Canadian Institutes of Health Research Flipping the script to recognize and stop sexual violence against young women
Canadian Centre for Child Protection Understanding Child Sexual Abuse: A guide for protective parents/guardians
SARE Centre (Sexual Assault Resistance Education) Girls Flip the Script with EAAA®
